CC Issue 40 / Comedy

Hello, Bob

I think I finally got rid of that hideous growth on my butt.  I went to Captain Fluffy Face who told me to work it off with a computer keyboard.

I bid goodbye to my left femur, though, because I discovered by mistake that my keyboard was equipped with ultra hot laser beams that could slice through skin and muscle and bone.  I wasn’t trying to sabotage my leg.  These things just happen when you’re working to rid yourself of something terribly ugly.

The good news is my neighbor, whom I had never met, noticed my bloody appendage I had thrown onto the front lawn and had pity on me.  For the next several months he fed me plenty of pepperoni pizza while I hopped around on one leg making strange goat noises.

My neighbor’s name is Bob and he’s great.

So, you see?  If you’re ever trying to get rid of a nasty growth on your body, you just might make a new friend and that is super duper awesome!

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